Not long ago, my kids and I were discussing how learning felt. In the conversation, we all identified things we were learning currently or have enjoyed learning in the past. “Learning” was more like a catch-all term that could also be replaced with others like “exploring,” “working on,” or “discovering.” The topics ranged from learning to independently cook a traditional, family cultural meal from scratch to working through geometry concepts. One child even talked about a myth he encountered in a book that sparked a research frenzy about similar and other myths told around the world.
All of us agreed on one thing—that learning was inherently joyful. It created feelings and identifiable responses that left deep, positive impressions on us as learners. That’s when I asked them a question: What is it that makes learning joyful? Can we identify and name it?
At this point, the conversation really ramped up. The kids started sharing stories of their personal experiences and offering up their theories on the key elements of joyful learning. I was not surprised at all by what they proposed. Here’s an example.
One child began to describe the joy he felt in the freedom to explore unfamiliar territory. He wanted to try something he had never really done on his own before. When he set out to do it, he didn’t even know if he would end up enjoying it. Excitement was a key factor in that initial period of beginning interest and discovery.
First, there was the excitement of doing something slightly risky and adventurous. He wasn’t sure how it would turn out but it led to a different kind of excitement—that of finding a new passion. Once he realized how much he liked the activities he was now invested in, the joy came from doing them often and at will. He got to dabble, mess around, tinker, and explore for quite a while to practice the skills associated with the interest. The work was enjoyable because the motivation and interest were high.
Not to mention how he was learning something in a very non-traditional way. That alone felt fun. He got to communicate what he was learning through expressive modalities that came naturally to him. He was doing deep work in a focused, relaxed way that produced confidence and calm, despite the encounters of challenge. It was an optimal state for learning, problem-solving, and creativity.
With all of the experiences and examples that my kids shared, I was able to extract and categorize what I have also observed repeatedly in many different educational settings. Learning is joyful by nature, and it’s almost as if the reasons why can fit into significant themes. I thought it might be helpful to list some of those themes below. As you watch your children learning, or as you engage with them in all the contexts in which learning happens, I hope that seeing this will remind you to focus on the joy!
Here are some things that make learning joyful:
When the learner receives regular feedback and encouragement.
One of my children told me, “When your family members are sitting around you and encouraging you to go on, it equals fun and joy.” When I think about feedback and encouragement, another concept that comes to mind is positive, clear communication. Even for a group of people working on something together (in any context), clear communication helps everyone to understand each other’s expectations and brings clarity around goals and intent. Talking through our own thinking with our children as we present ideas or observe them at work is just as important. I like to tell kids what I notice about their work and about them as they work. When they, in turn, give me this feedback, I find it so helpful. Encouragement, along with this type of observation and communication, gives children heartfelt reminders that their efforts can indeed be successful.
When there are positive relationship dynamics for all involved in the experience.
Feedback and encouragement lead nicely to the importance of supportive and trusting relationships. This type of learning environment is one of safety. One of my children put it like this: “It brings joy when you can learn in a safe place at your own pace and in your own way.” Through every conversation and interaction with our children, we are cultivating atmospheres of hope.
Making our homes a safe atmosphere for slow schooling has a lot to do with the ways that we interact with our children and hold space for their potential. “You can do hard things” is a refrain that is echoed often in our home. But as parents, we must never forget that persistence and resilience are not the only reasons we can do hard things. Sometimes, it’s because we have an ally who looks at us, smiles, and says, “I love you and I believe in you.” That’s what we do for our children.
The Joy of Slow by Leslie Martino
When there are opportunities to collaborate, partner, and connect in meaningful ways.
Education depends heavily on the relationship between the people involved. Every exchange, by nature of its transformative power, creates a joyful context for growth and learning to occur.
“Education lives by listening, dialogue, and participation with others in all kinds of encounters. It thrives where there is mutual respect.” The more we can provide relevant and needed support, create a strong mentoring relationship, and help our children relate well with others as they learn in various communities, the more we will discover how enjoyable the process is.
When playful elements are incorporated.
There’s no way around the fact that playfulness increases positive interactions and helps to build connection. An enthusiastic, playful approach does wonders for everyone’s state of mind. It creates the kind of low-pressure environment that helps learners thrive. This actually leads to more focus and better work. It’s like kindling for a fire.
When learners have autonomy and choice.
One of my children mentioned how delightful it is to be able to decide these things: how to respond to what they’re discovering, how to put new skills to use, and where to direct their next steps. The scope of what they were doing, making, reading, etc., was completely within their control. That spelled educational freedom. When a learner has some autonomy over their learning path, it fosters a sense of ownership and responsibility.
When the content is relevant, interesting, and engaging.
How many movies have you watched that include classic scenes of kids being bored in the classroom? Immediately, when I think about it, the 1986 (has it really been that long?) Ferris Bueller’s Day Off comes to mind, along with the muffled noises made by the teacher from Charlie Brown, which would make anyone feel bored and uninspired. Can you blame the kids in these scenes? It’s not difficult to imagine how relevant, interesting, and engaging content leads to more joy. Even with things we are less interested in, we can ask what makes them significant overall or how they can become more meaningful to us. Material is relevant when we can connect it to our lives, interests, goals, and plans. And engaging with material in varied ways keeps things fresh.
When learners are free to experiment and express their curiosity.
An atmosphere fueled by curiosity is an exciting place to work and learn. It’s the kind of environment where things like questions, creativity, imagination, and flexible thinking are encouraged. Unfortunately, many adults working with children end up stifling the very things they espouse conceptually. A learning atmosphere like this sounds amazing, but it also means we must get comfortable with the discomfort these creative, curiosity-driven processes create. It leads to joy for sure, but only if we allow for the uncertainty of it all.
When the learning environment welcomes mistakes and uncertainty, along with new challenges.
In 1987, educator Eleanor Duckworth wrote an essay about “the virtues of not knowing.” It involved the idea that an open-minded approach to new information fosters curiosity and a willingness to learn. That’s because being comfortable with uncertainty helps learners navigate challenges with greater flexibility. Not knowing, and what we ultimately do about it, can ironically lead to deeper knowledge. Recognizing that there’s always more to discover and having the freedom to make mistakes in the process of discovery can lead to a sense of wonder and excitement about the potential for learning. Also, when learners don’t fear failure, they embrace challenges differently. They take more risks in their learning, which can lead to better experimentation and deeper understanding.
The learning process can be engaging, fulfilling, and enjoyable. When we are open to the things included on this list, and we’re willing to experiment with what they can become in our homes, we are more likely to experience the joy that is inherent in the process. We need to take (and make) the time to be open. Simply put, slowing down makes time for joyful learning.
