Curiosity is a hallmark of childhood. Anyone who has spent time with young children knows about the relentless stream of “why” questions they tend to ask. They often display a wide-eyed fascination with the world. But as children grow older, this natural wonder seems to wane. The very traits that made them eager learners in their early years can fade under the pressures of academic achievement and societal expectations. Yet, the desire to explore, discover, and question never truly disappears—it just needs the right environment to flourish. Let’s take some time to explore this a bit. Why does wonder tend to fade in older children? I hope to offer some practical strategies for keeping curiosity alive in tweens and teens.
Why Wonder Fades as Kids Get Older
The transition from early childhood to the tween and teen years usually comes with a shift in priorities. Academic success, extracurricular achievements, and social dynamics can take center stage, leaving little room for open-ended exploration. In many traditional educational settings, the focus shifts from discovery to performance. Grades, test scores, and meeting external standards become the primary measures of success. In many homeschool settings, there is pressure to accomplish more because parents realize that the end is more clearly in sight. Time doesn’t seem as spacious anymore and it’s harder to allow space for things like creative pursuits, fully exploring or uncovering a topic or field, and embracing failures as part of growth.
This results-oriented mindset can unintentionally suppress curiosity. When kids are told to only follow rigid curricula or discouraged from pursuing “off-topic” interests, they may begin to see learning as a chore rather than a joy. Additionally, the packed schedules of older children can leave little time for unstructured play or quiet reflection, both of which are keys to nurturing wonder.
Another factor is the increasing influence of peers and media. Sometimes as children grow older, they become more concerned with fitting in, which can potentially mean setting aside their unique interests or hiding their enthusiasm for fear of being labeled as “uncool.” Social pressure can dampen their willingness to explore topics that truly spark their curiosity. This can happen in subtle ways (like a casual comment from a friend who doesn’t enjoy the same pastimes) and if there is little encouragement or support for their ideas and interests at home, this can compound the issue.
The good news is that curiosity isn’t reserved for the very young. With intentional effort, we can create environments that reignite a love of learning and exploration in older children. Here are some strategies to help you nurture wonder in your tweens and teens.
Strategies for Maintaining Curiosity in Tweens and Teens
Encourage Hands-On Projects
Older children thrive when we give them opportunities to engage in hands-on, interest-based projects or work. Whether it’s joining a musical theater group, conducting a science experiment, building a model, creating a piece of art, or designing a tech gadget, these activities allow them to explore their interests in a tangible and rewarding way.
The key is to follow their lead. If your tween is fascinated by astronomy, consider investing in a telescope or partnering with an observatory to chart constellations. If your teen loves coding, encourage them to develop a simple app or game. I accompanied my teen to the meetings of a local birding/photography group. They were mostly retirees surprised by her interest, but she was happy to attend and participate. Hands-on projects not only deepen knowledge but also give older children a sense of ownership over their learning.
Another way to foster this is by integrating cross-disciplinary projects. For example, a teen interested in history could create a historically accurate costume or build a scale model of a historical place. A music lover might experiment with creating their own compositions, recording an EP, or learning about the physics of sound. These projects allow older children to see the connections between different fields of knowledge and spark a deeper curiosity about how the world works.
Embrace Outdoor Exploration
Nature is one of the best antidotes to a curiosity drought. Outdoor exploration invites older children to step away from structured routines, exchange screens for green spaces, and engage with the natural world. Hiking, birdwatching, or signing up for Monarch butterfly tagging can spark awe and wonder, while activities like environmental conservation projects or gardening teach responsibility and provide meaningful experiences.
Even simple outings, like a walk through a local park or a nighttime skywatch, can remind tweens and teens of the beauty and complexity of the world around them. These experiences often lead to deeper questions (What affects the seasons in different locations around the world? How do ecosystems work? What role does a keystone species play in this environment?) and open the door to further exploration.
For families who live in urban environments, outdoor exploration can still be a meaningful experience. I grew up in New York City and still loved to explore the outdoors (You can read more about my nature experiences here). Visit botanical gardens, parks, or nature reserves, and encourage older children to keep a nature journal. Documenting their observations and questions can help them engage more deeply with the natural world and foster a sense of curiosity and stewardship.
Model Lifelong Learning
As parents and educators, one of the most powerful ways we can inspire curiosity in older children is by modeling it ourselves. When they see adults excited about learning, they’re more likely to adopt a similar mindset. When we pursue interests and actually operate as if learning is joyful, our children understand that adults continue to be interesting people. We are demonstrating a lifestyle.
Share your interests with your kids, whether that means picking up a new hobby, diving into a documentary, or tackling a challenging DIY project. Be a learner yourself—someone who’s willing to ask questions, make mistakes, and embrace the pleasure of discovery. Make your internal processes a little more visible. Invite your children into conversations that are genuine expressions of your thinking and feelings. In addition, do things together! For example, if your teen shows an interest in photography, consider learning right alongside them. Borrow books from the library, experiment with different techniques, and celebrate the process together. Some kids really love this when you are being genuine in your openness and curiosity.
Remember that it’s helpful to let older children see you wrestle with questions and challenges. If you don’t know something, model how to find answers. This might mean reading information, watching tutorials, or reaching out to experts. By showing that learning is a lifelong process, you help normalize curiosity and exploration as part of everyday life.
Encourage Open-Ended Questions and Discussions
Older children frequently have complex thoughts and opinions they are eager to share when given the chance. Creating space for open-ended discussions can be a powerful way to nurture their curiosity. Instead of focusing solely on finding “right” answers, we can encourage them to explore different perspectives and ask deeper questions.
For example, if your child is interested in current events, invite them to discuss why certain issues arise and what solutions might exist. There’s sometimes background information that they’d like to grapple with and you can help them think critically about conclusions they draw and answers they find. If they’re curious about a scientific phenomenon, brainstorm together what might be possible in that field in the future. These conversations help them develop critical thinking skills while reinforcing that their curiosity and ideas are valued.
One of the most enjoyable things about teens and tweens is that at this stage, you can have some truly wonderful and rich conversations with them. They are the kind of conversations in which you are cooperatively contributing and sharing knowledge. It’s not the same power dynamic as the directive-driven conversing that typically happens in the younger years (“Please wash your hands so we can sit down and have lunch” or “Let’s put these breakfast dishes away so we can gather for a read aloud.”) It’s also not the same as expecting a particular answer before you’ve even asked the question. It’s a beautiful way to connect and learn from each other.
Allow Downtime for Reflection
In a world that prioritizes busyness, it’s easy to overlook the importance of quiet time and rest. Yet, unstructured moments of reflection are crucial for nurturing curiosity. They give older kids the mental space to process what they’ve learned, think creatively, and develop their own ideas.
Encourage your children to carve out regular moments of downtime. This could involve journaling, listening to music while dawdling in their room, engaging in a relaxed family discussion, or simply daydreaming. You might also create a cozy reading nook or a quiet outdoor space where they can retreat when they need time to recharge. We recently changed the furniture around in our living room and one of my children expressed that sadly, he lost his reading and thinking spot. He liked the way the sun streamed in from the window right onto the pillows he used to nestle in. I loved that he told me about it and I got to help him recreate a new spot.
Downtime isn’t “wasted” time; it’s often when the seeds of wonder are planted and begin to grow. We can encourage our children to use this time to explore their interests further or simply let their minds wander. Both are valuable for fostering curiosity and creativity.
Encourage Risk-Taking and Learning from Failure
Curiosity commonly involves stepping into the unknown, which can be intimidating for older children who may fear failure or judgment. Encourage your tweens and teens to take risks in their learning, whether that means trying a new activity, tackling a challenging project, or exploring a topic they know little about.
It’s important to create an environment where mistakes are seen as a natural part of the learning process. Share stories of times when you’ve failed and what you learned from the experience. Respond to the vulnerability they show in ways that support risk-taking. That means being intentional with your words and thoughtful about your responses. Celebrate their efforts and resilience, regardless of the outcome, to help them build confidence in their ability to explore and grow.
Provide Access to Diverse Resources
Finally, my last piece of advice is to try your best to give your children access to a wide range of resources that can inspire and support their curiosity. This might include books, online courses, workshops, or community programs. Consider visiting museums, attending lectures, or exploring local cultural events together. Exposing them to a variety of ideas, cultures, and disciplines can broaden their horizons and spark new interests. I love interacting with new ideas that help to nurture my own thoughts.
Technology can also be a powerful tool for fostering curiosity when used intentionally. It might be appropriate for your children to use different educational apps, watch particular documentaries, or join an online group related to their interests. Just be mindful of balancing screen time with other activities to ensure a well-rounded approach to learning.
Lastly, when it comes to resources, don’t be afraid to explore books with your teens and tweens in their entirety, not just excerpts or snippets of writing here and there. This is a great way to nurture wonder and curiosity. We can use quality resources to help them develop habits of deep reading. In an October 2024 article in The Atlantic entitled “The Elite College Students Who Can’t Read Books,” the author writes of reports from professors on the increasing amount of students who arrive at their colleges unprepared to read challenging texts. In some cases, they struggle with the amount of books assigned and in other cases, they struggle to extract meaning from what they’re reading. They lack the patience to go beyond shallow perusal and struggle to read in depth. Homeschooling lends itself well to creating opportunities to do this in partnership. We can tackle complex ideas and analyze information with our children as they learn to do it independently.
Final Thoughts
Wonder isn’t something we outgrow; it’s something that can flourish throughout life if given the chance. The ideas I discussed in this post are just some of the ways we can create an environment where tweens and teens feel inspired to ask questions, explore new ideas, and nurture their innate curiosity.
In a world that often prioritizes achievement over exploration, let’s be the ones to slow down and show our older children that learning is a joyful experience. It certainly is about much more than grades and test scores. It’s a lifelong adventure, full of opportunities to wonder, grow, and connect with the world around them. Together, we can help them rediscover the joy of curiosity and carry it with them into adulthood.
I discuss these ideas and so much more in my book The Joy of Slow: Restoring Balance and Wonder to Homeschool Learning. You can find out more about it here.
